Friday, July 23, 2010

S.A.B.A.R

'pukul berapa jam la?'

' jarum panjang tunjuk nombor 3, jarum pendek tunjuk nombor 8' (macam jawapn budak kecik yang baru belajar nak tengok jam)

'ok.set lunch ngan chicken&chips dah abis k' (pesanan dari staf kitchen).

aku baru je nak menyedut iced choclate special (yang aku buat sendiri), tiba-tiba datang seorang customer yang bukan sebangsa dengan aku. aku pon memaksa diri aku untuk senyum dan bersiap sedia dengan pen dan kertas di tangan untuk menulis order beliau.

'saya nak set lunch satu!' (sambil menghulurkan wang berwarna merah)

mak ai. lapar bebeno nampak beliau ni. dah la berpeluh-peluh macam baru lepas habis acara pecut 4x400 meter berhalangan.urgh!

'i'm sorry sir. our lunch set is finished already. would you like to try any other meal?' (wah!sopan nya aku.etika kerja beb!)

'huh?abis ha?so, apa ada?'

'yang lain semua ada incik kecuali set lunch dan chicken&chips'

'ok.kasi saya set lunch!'

'sori iencik, set lunch dah habis' (volume aku dah naik sikit)

'sekarang apa ada?' (dia overtake volume aku. darah aku dah naik sampai hidung)

'sekarang semua ada kecuali set lunch dan Chicken&chips' (ulang aku dengan kadar kelajauan labi-labi merangkak dengan susah payah)

'tadi i mintak set lunch u cakap dah habis. sekarang bagi saya set lunch!'

ni memang dah tak boleh dikawal. darah aku dah naik sampai ubun-ubun kepala dah.

'SAYA CAKAP.. SEMUA ORDER ADA KECUALI SET LUNCH DAN CHICKEN&CHIPS! DENGAR TAK??!!

ambik kau!tak pasal-pasal semua mata tengok aku. ada yang buat muka terkejut.ada yang tergelak. yang paling best sekali member aku dah siap terguling-guling atas lantai gelakkan aku. aku rasa muka aku pun dah macam tenuk tak berak sepuluh hari masa tu. customer yang 3 kali ganda besar dari aku tu aku tengok kecik botol kicap jalen je.. merah padam muka dia.

'ok la.bagi saya chicken&chips la.'

tiba-tiba aku rasa darah aku berhenti mengalir. aku dah tak cukup oksigen nak layan customer sorang ni. aku terus masuk kitchen dan sedut coklat ais sampai habis.

kalau lah nak jadi sabar semudah mengeja perkataan lima aksara ni, mesti dunia ni aman.

Thursday, July 22, 2010

format kan aje!!!hehe


Dear Tech Support,


Last year, I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slow down in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.
In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as
Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed undesirable programs such as
NBA 5.0,
NFL 3.0 and
Golf Clubs 4.1.
Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and HouseCleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system.
Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.
What can I do?
Signed,
Desperate.

Baca artikel ini sepenuhnya untuk tahu apa jawapannya

DEAR DESPERATE,
First, keep in mind,
Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system.
Please enter command: ithoughtyoulovedme.HTML, try to download Tears 6.2, and do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update.
If those applications work as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.
However, remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer 6.1.
Please note that Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta.
Whatever you do, DO NOT under any circumstances install Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.)
In addition, please do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program. This is an unsupported application and will crash Husband 1.0.
In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend Cooking 3.0 and Hot Lingerie 7.7.

Good Luck!

Tech Support